Friday, July 18, 2008

Story of A Girl

[One of my story's from last year I started with, think I should continue? -AnkaChan92, old account name]


Chapter 1- Anastasia
I never thought that being different,
Could be so destructive.
I never thought I had a problem,
Until now.
I have horns upon my head.
I’m special.
My name is Anastasia Katzagoitz.
Call me Anoka.
I am mentally unstable.
I have a problem.
Alice.
Alice is taking over me.
I have reasons to believe so anyways.
I’m usually happy.
I’m usually in control of myself,
But she’s taking over.
She’s changing me.
I used to look in the mirror,
And I’d see myself.
Now I see Alice.
She’s watching me,
Preparing to attack.
She’s taking me away from everyone.
She’s pulling me back.
She’s trying to come out.
She’s trying to control my life.
I need to stop her.
Don’t judge me yet.
I know you probably think
That I’m really crazy.
I’m just me though.
All I’m looking for is acceptance.
I want someone to understand me.
I want a friend.
Chapter 2- Innocence and Evil
Today we talked.
I sat down at my desk and looked at the mirror.
Finally, I saw her coming.
Her eyes were all I noticed.
They weren’t like my icy blue ones.
Hers resembled fire.
I found myself crouching over,
Looking down at the floor.
I couldn’t look at her.
It hurt.
“What do you want?”
“Hi Alice. I wanted to talk.”
“About?”
“Why?”
“Why what?”
“Why do you keep ruining things?
Why do you keep pushing people away!?”
She laughed, “Why do you care?
No one is going to accept you Anoka.
No one… Not ever!
You’re too different.
No one likes a girl with horns.
Besides…If they saw you at night, and what you become,
They’d all run.
They’d all be afraid and avoid you.”
I yelled, “SHUT UP! I HATE YOU! GO AWAY!”
Suddenly the door slammed open.
My mother.
She saw me crying,
But she didn’t come near me.
“Anastasia! What are you doing!?
Why are you yelling at the mirror??”
A gasp.
“Mom… I… It’s nothing. Just go away.”
She shut the door.
She didn’t care.
She never cared.
She never will.
I looked back in the mirror.
She backed down.
Alice was gone.
“Alice?...”
No answer…
“Alice, you coward.”
I walked back to my bed and sat down.
“It’s not my fault.
It’s hers.
My friends wouldn’t leave me.
Would they?
Well…They’ve never seen my horns.
Tomorrow…In school,
I’ll remove my hat.
I’ll see if they run.
I know they won’t.
They wouldn’t.
Or would they?”
I sighed, frustrated.
“It’s so confusing!
I hate you Alice!
I hate you…”
Suddenly I felt a sharp pain.
It grew.
I held my head tightly,
Then fell off the bed.
“Alice, no!”
I gripped my head tighter and before I knew it,
I was gone.
She laughed.
“Now I’m in control.”
She walked downstairs,
Passing my mother.
“Where are you going Anoka?”
“Shut up lady!”
She walked out of the house.
I'm in trouble now.
Chapter 3- Authority
She walked down the porch.
Then Mother ran out.
“Anastasia!How dare you yell at me like that?”
She turned and looked at Mother,
Pausing.
“Listen here you,
I’m in control.
You listen to me!
I’m not taking any crap from you!
Not anymore.
So next time I say shut up!
You listen to me!
You old hag!”
Then Mother scoffed,
Leaned over, and slapped her.
I felt the pain
From Mother’s wedding ring.
It stung across my face.
Alice didn’t feel any pain.
It’s like,
She couldn’t.
I only felt the pain.
Was it because this is
My body?
Why doesn’t
She feel anything?…
Unsurprisingly,
Alice slapped mother right back.
Then she walked away,
Leaving Mother’s sight completely.
~*~
Alice walked down the road,
For quite some time,
Passing many places.
Suddenly a boy appeared.
“Anoka?”
It was Charlie, my best friend.
She looked over at him and nodded.
“Why didn’t you call me?”
“I was busy,
My mum’s being stupid again.”
“What happened?”
“She slapped me…I slapped her back”
She smirked.
“WHAT!? YOU HIT YOUR MOM?”
“Yeah?... So?
Shut up and don’t worry about it.”
Charlie seemed disturbed.
“Got a smoke?”
Alice was REALLY trying to ruin me.
“You don’t smoke…”
“Now I do,Hand one over.”
He handed her a cigarette.
She put it in her mouth,
Lit it, and then dragged it.
Finally she exhaled.
“Someone’s finallyActing bad.”
“I was born bad.”
She blew the smoke into his face,
Flicked the cigarette at him,
Then walked away.
I finally spoke out.
“Alice where are you going?”
“Anoka?....What?
Why are you talking?”
“Just answer you body-stealer.
Where are you taking us?
Wait... Where are you taking me!?
“Shut up…”
“NO! ANSWER ME”
“You’re talking back. Naughty,
Naughty.
“Alice bring me home…”
“Fine… I’m bored anyways”
Charlie was following behind.
I didn’t even see him.“Who are you talking to?”
“Myself, got a problem?”
“You’re acting differently Anoka.
What’s your prob?"
She whispered.
“Hey Anoka guess what?”
“What!?”
Alice turned to Charlie.
Smirking.
She pulled his arm,
Bringing him closer,
Then she kissed him.
Finally, she punched him in the stomach.
He lunged forward
And dropped to his knees.
His eyes began to fill in tears.
Oh no!…
Charlie!
She dropped to her knees too.
Anoka!
You can’t come out!
Watch me.
She punched herself in the stomach.
Fell over, laying on her back.
“Anoka?...
W…W-Why’d you….?
Charlie was stuttering.
I sat up and held my head.
“Charlie?”
I started crying.
“I’m so sorry!”
I hugged him.
“Don’t touch me.”
I gasped.
He hates me now…
I got up and ran all the way home,
Slammed the door as I got inside the house,
Then ran up to my room and locked the door.
“Alice… You’re so horrid.
I hate you!”
I hopped on my bed and lay down.
Stupid Alice….
Stupid Mother…..
Stupid Charlie….
Stupid Me…
Maybe I don’t hate Alice…
Maybe I just hate myself….
Maybe she’s just an excuse….
An excuse to be mean?
Never…
She’s R-E-A-L….
But why?....
Why was she created?....
Am I crazy?...
So many thoughts ran through my head.
I eventually just drifted off…
Into my thoughts…
Then away…Into dreamland….

1 comment:

Gina said...

Hey anka/jellybean- I remember this story from last year. I like how quick it is to read, and that all the type is centered. It's usually annoying, but it works very well in this case. It reads quickly and spasmodically, almost mimicking the schizophrenic speech of Anoka.

I think maybe you should change the title to something more sinister, like "The Girl with Horns" or "My Brain's Dictator" or "The Girl in the Mirror", I don't know. I am apparently not very good at coming up with title ideas at close to one in the morning. Well, good luck with this, I want to read more!