According to a nine-year old girl today, I look like I am a Goth. I can't say that I know why... let's review the most defining stereotypical aspects of Gothic style and see if they applied to me today...
My overly dramatic, heavy makeup? Minimal eye shadow, no eyeliner, nothing black.
My long, pointy, and deathly black nails? Painted white, and chipped severely.
My extensive and gory succession of piercings and tattoos? Nonexistent.
My dark, shabby clothes with heavy chains, wicked spikes and ripped fabric? Well, that wasn't an indicator at all, considering that I was wearing a tae kwon do uniform at the time: pristinely white and still creased at the folds.
My zanily dyed hair, sticking up at odd angles? A natural shade of brown, in a ponytail, with somewhat messy side bangs sweeping the right side of my forehead.
So... WHAT GAVE ME AWAY???
I have yet to find out, exactly... I can only presume that a nine-year-old thinks that all girls in high school who have bangs and a dryly sarcastic sense of humor are Gothic. Well, as this year's reigning champion of the "Anything For A Laugh" contest, I will show up to my third tae kwon do lesson with freshly-painted black nails and perhaps, if I feel up to it, some wild eye makeup. I'm Goth now? Okay, I'll show you how Goth I supposedly am... MUAHAHAHA!