BEHOLD THE MAGICAL DISAPPEARING BRAIN!

Let it astound you with its feats of wisdom one minute, then totally vanish the next, leaving the wearer incapable of uttering anything intelligent! When you ask it for a brilliant idea, you’ll literally have a head full of air! Observe how it dissolves completely as it is asked to provide a witty remark!

Examine the deluxe model as well. This version is more sophisticated and temporarily deletes certain parts of your brain, like the kinds that store information for math tests and quiz shows! It also gets rid of parts that remember why you walked into that room, or what you wanted to get at the supermarket!

Some models have already been installed in unsuspecting people who were told only that they were participating in a medical study that involved regular sedation and some light anesthesia. Who knows, maybe you could be the next lucky* wearer! Enter your name, Social Security number, and financial information into this box for your chance to win and be totally clueless!

*Magical Disappearing Brain™ is copyright of Quack Meds, inc., and may be a scam. The purchaser is fully responsible for all decisions, accidents, and general stupidity caused by usage. Any attempt to sue the company will result in heavy fines for the purchaser, as well as losing the case.

life always missed

this isn't very good, there will probably b a lot of critism but oh well. read it if u wanna luv
maddie

my life has passed in days by days
and months and years
and in so many other ways
like in fits of laughter and just crying hard
thoughts overwhelming wishing so hard that you could be home
desperately trying to escape parents in doom
because it's scary now that you know

hoping to be respected well
all the while missing being daddy's little girl.
all of life's twisted facts
believing once that you were safe
but now knowing not,
smirking about little kids missing entirely
little side conservations about how funny they are
those times when they are entirely sincere.

those times that made life special disappear
now that we know how to act sincere,
now that we are all growed up
we figure out life sucks
get used to it.