Overload/Mental Fermentation

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When there is oxygen present in a cell, it goes through a process called cellular respiration in order to give the body energy in the form of adenine triphosphate, or ATP. When oxygen is not present in the cell, it is forced to go through a process called fermentation instead. The two kinds of fermentation are lactic acid fermentation and alcohol fermentation. These days it seems like fermentation would be a good metaphor for my life. Work has used up all my good energy and now I'm running on empty. This gives my life a leg cramp, forcing me to stop something or eventually fall over hard. This means I have to sacrifice some of the stuff I would love to be doing to complete homework assignments and the like. While this sacrifice is unwanted, it allows oxygen to flow back into the used areas of the life and function normally.

I Am So Sorry

I knew that i was treading water
feeling things that made me sadder
i knew that what i said was mean
i was angry, not meaning a thing.

i was wrong and i couldn't realize it
saying things despite real feelings
i knew that this should've stopped
i didn't apologize till it was too late.

i cry and cry, all day long
missing things, way past gone
i may never regain her trust
but i will also never say things out of betrayingness

i didn't realize that i was wrong
until i lost her
she's way past gone
she'll never talk to me again
and this makes me hate me now and then

i never really filtered thoughts
just wrote stuff down out of frustrationess
she was the bigger person
i teared her down
and can't get her back.

I apologized
cause i'm so so sorry
i miss her now
and can't be without her.

i didn't know that i needed her
she hates me
and it seems all over

i lost my best friend today
i hate it so much
and i'll just cry
i hope to see her again
have her talk
even if it's mean
i'd rather have her slap my face
than lose her now
when i need her most.